todo (break) / jodo (fix)

(Written 23 January 2024, 1:33 am ET)

todo, todo, todo

tod marod ke tumne
sachhaayi phod ke tumne
tod ko jod kehlaaya hai

ek soch ko baant kar
praja ko daant kar
dar nafrat ko behlaaya hai

jiska raaj nirmaan
tha sabka kalyaan
uske naam ka ghamand dehlaaya hai

kar lo jo karna hai
satya dharma voh jharna hai
jisne andhvishvaas ko pighlaaya hai

na pradhaanta kabhi jeeti hai
na sachhi bhakti kabhi beeti hai
ekta ne hi unnati ko sehlaaya hai

jodo, jodo, jodo

It all

(Written 21 May 2023, at 12:25 am)

You broke a lot
Of what it meant
To be me 

Did you break it all?
I think yes sometimes 
Sometimes, I think no, though. 

You carved and shaved
And deeply engraved
Every curve and dent  
That I ever meant 

How could you know (or care)
What it did to me, and how it laid me bare 
Because you stopped to love 
Every robin and every dove?

(Did you watch the season finale of grey’s anatomy?)

Drown

(Written 20 May 2023 at 11:09 pm)

Drown drown drowned
Into the sound
Of pitter patter
As raindrops scatter

Haze haze hazed
Uncomfortably aware and dismally dazed
In remarkable deft
Of thoughts bereft

Desire

(Written 10 May 2023 at 12:13 am ET)

Tear down what you know to be true
Find the rabid red in the blissful blue
Let it spill if it must
All desire is not lust

Passion need not forgiveness seek
Wants need not be weighed and meek
Let all it is be not “just”
All desire is not lust

Floating is not always untethered
Not everything that flies is feathered
See the stories in the dust
All desire is not lust

Simplicity is not always mere
Pain takes forms other than a tear
Remember it takes iron to rust
All desire is not lust

one day

(written 29 april 2023, at 2:15 am et)

it all came apart one day

“helter skelter” are the words they used

but from the inside

it looked like perhaps the tea was a little oversteeped

that’s all

but not from the outside

they said it all came apart one day

or was it night?

pieces of a feeling

(Written 30 January 2023, at 10:28 PM ET.)

someone took a feeling and shattered it.

i'm running around
trying to find
more than two pieces that fit
together

to have a feeling
again.

how broken

(written 26 december 2022, 4:20 am et.)

 
it confounds me that somehow, sometimes,
the past finds its way to the present.

is it reality? or just the wine-coloured glasses through which i view it?

does it matter?

am i not broken enough, or too broken,

for the words to find me?

i wish to drop the carefully

(though unintentionally)

stitched veneer,

like dropping a silk gown

(worn commando)

in a fell swoop.

(i want it to be sexy.)

do any of the constructs hold up?

or is it a brave new world

that i'm simply not brave enough for?

(a friend told me ending sentences in prepositions

is not the crime i thought it was.

maybe that's the answer to undo all my questions.

nothing i ever thought ever mattered.)