Tell Me (1)

(Written March 2006, at age 18.)

tell me baby that when times are rough
and when things at home go sour and bad
you don't feel a little lonely
you don't go back to conversations we had

tell me that when you go to sleep
you don't feel my mouth on your lips
you don't feel my body rustle beside yours
you don't feel my arms around your hips

tell me that when you see your bed
i'm not lying half-dressed across its grace
you don't feel me pull you down
roll over, and let my hair fall over your face

tell me that every time you drive
you don't miss all the "slow down"s i said
you don't miss my fingers tugging at your hand
you don't miss the kiss at every red

tell me that every time you see your reflection
the colours in your eyes don't remind you
of me falling in love with them
of sinking in them, through and through

i know i made a mistake, baby
bigger than any you ever made
you know i'd undo it if i could
but that's already sealed in my fate

i'm sorrier than you'll ever know
that i ever caused you a moment of pain
but baby you mean the world to me
come back and keep me from going insane

otherwise tell me baby, just tell me now
that you're truly happier without me
that you can see yourself with someone else
that you'll find love truer than me

i can't promise i'll give up hope
but it'll make me smile anyway
to see you happy and satisfied
just what you deserve, in every way

it'll make me smile anyway
when i think of the times we've shared
you can't take back what you've already given
the times that you have really cared

but first darling just tell me
that it isn't my skin you remember
that it ain't my body, my lips, my hair,
that we aren't meant to be together